Saturday 17 August 2013

a reason to the end

7th Aug'13: The day would have been like any other had it not been for the muscle catch on the lower back when Amma was about to sleep. Blame it on the cot which was high

8th Aug'13: Amma could not bear the pain and She was taken to Berunda clinic where She was given a muscle relaxant injection and pain killer pills

9th and 10th Aug'13: The pain just did not reduce, Amma found it very difficult to walk, sit or sleep. She is able to walk with the support of the walker

11th Aug'13: Amma experienced pain in the right shoulder which was severe. The pain in the lower back has just not reduced

12th Aug'13: On consulting the physician we had visited on 8th Aug, he changed the pain killers. The pain in the right shoulder and lower back just did not reduce. It has been four days since She has slept. Anna is doing the massage everyday.

13th Aug'13: Took Amma to Jayanagar Orthopedic Center. The X-ray reports showed no signs of injury to the lower back or the right shoulder. She was given Inac injection to reduce the pain.

14th Aug'13: At 0600 hrs, Amma found it very difficult to breathe. Blisters started forming on the right arm and they bursted with clear fluid oozing out. She was given nebulization by our neighbour untill the ambulance arrived. The saturation has dropped and Her blood pressure was dropping. On reaching Apollo Hospital Bannerghatta Road at 0900 hrs, She was tired and was in a state of shock. Doctors confirmed that the blood was infected, She is in a critical state and had to be admitted to ICU. Due to non-availability of ICU ward there, She was shifted in the ambulance to the Jayanagar branch. She was still on nebulizer with the blisters forming and bursting. The doctors in the emergency informed me that Amma is in a critical condition, the internal organs have gone into shock and if the renal function does not reinstate, She will experience multiple organ failure. Amma was quickly shifted to ICU where the treatment began. In the evening, a minor surgery was done on the right arm to clear the clot which prevented the blood flow from the wrist to the finger tips. When the doctors called me for the consent to place Her on ventilator, Amma was awake but now unable to speak because of the oxygen mask. I assured Amma that the right shoulder is now fixed and She would be back to normal very soon. I asked Amma to be brave and told Her that She is in a shock since morning, She needs to focus on deep breathing and everything will be fine. She nodded Her head neutrally. The duty doctor mentioned that the kidney is not functioning as expected and is still in a state of shock.

15th Aug'13: At 0900 hrs when i saw Amma, She was in deep sleep because of the anesthesia that was administered to place Her on the ventilator. Her right arm was still in the sling. Her left arm had turned bluish black in color and when i felt it, it was cold. Amma did not respond when i touched Her forehead and pressed Her hands. The doctor mentioned that Her blood pressure is not stabilizing and the kidney output is very low. At 1130 hrs, Anna came and both of us went to visit Amma. Amma had a cardiac arrest and all attempts to reinstate failed. Amma left at 1220 hrs. She looked like She was in a deep sleep and we could not wake Her up.

1630 hrs, Amma visited Her home. Hundreds thronged the place to pay their respects. 1730 hrs Amma left Home and 1900 hrs Her mortal remains turned to ashes.

17th Aug'13: Ashes made one with the river Kaveri at Paschimavahani, Srirangapatna


Thursday 15 August 2013

ಅಮ್ಮ

" ನನ್ನ ಅಮ್ಮ "
ನವಮಾಸ ನಿನ್ನ ಒಡಲೊಳಗೆ ನನ್ನ ಹೊತ್ತು
ಭುವಿಗೆ ಸ್ವಾಗತಿಸಿದ ಅಮ್ಮನಿಗೆ ನಮೋ ನಮಃ
ನಾನು ನಾನಾಗಲು ಪ್ರೇರೇಪಿಸಿದ ತಾಯಿಯೇ ನಮೋ ನಮಃ

ಅಕ್ಷರ ಮಾಲೆಯ ಅಕ್ಕರದಿ ಕಲಿಸಿ
ನೀತಿ ಪಾಟಗಳ ಸನ್ಮಾರ್ಗದಲಿ ನಡೆಸಿದ
ನನ್ನ ಪ್ರೀತಿಯ ಗುರುವೇ  ನಮೋ ನಮಃ

ನನ್ನ ಆಟ ಪಾಟಗಳಲಿ ಹರುಷವ ಕಂಡು
ನನ್ನ ನೋವನ್ನು ನಿನ್ನ ನೋವೆಂದು ನೊಂದು
ಉಸಿರಿಗೆ ಉಸಿರಾದ ಉಸಿರೇ ನಮೋ ನಮಃ

ರಸದೂಟವ ನನಗೆಂದು ಉಣ ಬಡಿಸಿ
ಅದರ ಸವಿಯಲ್ಲೇ ತಂಗಳನ್ನವ ಉಂಡು
ಪೋಷಿಸಿದ ಅನ್ನಪೂರ್ಣಳೆ ನಮೋ ನಮಃ

ಸಂಸಾರ ನಾವೆಯ ನಗುವಿಂದಲೇ ಸಾಗಿಸಿ
ಸೂರಾದೆ ನೀ ಕಷ್ಟಗಳ ಮಳೆ ಸುರಿಯೆ
ನನ್ನ ದೈನಂದಿನ ಶಕ್ತಿಯೇ ನಮೋ ನಮಃ

ಕಾರಣವಿಲ್ಲದೆ ಕಾರಣವಾದ
ನಗುತಲಿ ಅಳುವುದ ಸಾರಿ ಹೋದ
ನನ್ನ ಜೀವನದಿಯೇ ನಮೋ ನಮಃ

ಆ ದಿನದ ನನ್ನ ಅಳು ನಿನ್ನ ನಗು
ಈ ದಿನದ ನಿನ್ನ ನಗು ನನ್ನ ಅಳು
ಆ ಪರಮಾತ್ಮನಿಗೇ ಒಗಟು ಹೇಳಿದ ಸುಚರಿತಳೇ ನಮೋ ನಮಃ

ವಿದಾಯ ಹೇಳಿ ನಾ ದೂರವಾಗಲಾರೆ
ಕಣ್ಣೀರಿಟ್ಟು ನಿನ್ನ ನಾ ಹೋಗಿ ಬಾ ಎಂದ್ದೆನ್ನಲಾರೆ
ಮರಣವೇ ಸತ್ಯವಾದರೆ ಆ ಮರಣದ ಮೇಲಾಣೆ
ಮತ್ತೆ ಹುಟ್ಟಿ ಬರುವೆ ನಾ ನಿನ್ನ ಕಂದನಾಗಿ

ಜನ್ಮವಿತ್ತ ಅಮ್ಮನಿಗೆ ನಿನ್ನ ಮಗ ವಿಶ್ವನಾಥನ ಅಶ್ರು ತರ್ಪಣ